The Top 20 Airplane Travel Rules Unofficial Etiquette Guide

There are thousands of people who have never stepped foot onboard an airplane. Eventually, an opportunity to travel will present itself and these first time flyers will enthusiastically pack their suitcases and embark on their maiden flight. But will you be guilty of making these mistakes on your first flight? As a Flight Attendant, I see these airplane travel rules being violated by first timers and even frequent flyers.

First off, I’m aware that the majority of people have misconceptions about the role of Flight Attendants. I once gave a talk to a group of 10 year olds for career day. I posed the following question to the group. “What is the reason for Flight Attendants on the plane?” One young man immediately raised his hand and said, “a maid?” OK. It’s time to nip that perception in the bud. A Flight Attendant’s primary job responsibility is to save your life in the unlikely event of an emergency.

The likelihood of an incident occurring is upon takeoff and landing. It’s one of those rare jobs you continuously train for and pray that you never have to use your training. Everything else we do onboard is simply to make your flight as pleasant and enjoyable as possible.

If you want to reveal your status as a first time flyer, or a VIP flyer, here are 20 airplane travel rules to keep in mind when you fly.

  1. Block The Aisle During Boarding. This is surefire tactic to bring joy to your fellow passengers patiently waiting behind you. They love watching your award-winning technique as you fold your clothing and gently place it in the overhead bin. Also, blocking the aisle gives onlookers the opportunity to admire your gluteus Maximus.
  2. Take Up An Entire Overhead Bin. Imagine the delight your plane mates will have when they see you’ve taken all the overhead bin space. After all, you’re a V.I.P. (Very Inconsiderate Passenger). They won’t mind checking their tiny roller board because of your elite status. Another shameless tactic is using the first class overhead bin if you’re booked in the coach cabin. Remember, you’re a VIP. Feel free to place your items in the first class cabin despite the fact you’re sitting in 31A.
  3. Be High Maintenance As Soon As You Board. Flight Attendants simply adore this type of behavior. You’ll get special attention as word will quickly spread using the interphone system. We love performing service during boarding just for you. After all, it’s your duty to be certain you get everything that’s free because your cheap cheap airfare entitles you to it.
  4. Blame The Flight Attendants For Delays. Ah! The joys of traveling. You haven’t traveled until your flight has been delayed. It’s sheer pleasure for everyone involved – especially your Flight Attendants. Imagine the excitement they experience because they get to stay on the job without pay. Did you know that the flight crew only gets paid when the door is closed and the brake is released? Anyway, working ‘overtime’ without pay is a privilege and taking the blame for weather, air traffic, etc., is another highlight of their workday.
  5. Make Physical Contact With The Flight Attendants. After all, touch is everything, right? There aren’t many places that come to mind where this is acceptable behavior. But on board, anything goes. We Flight Attendants simply love it when you poke us, tug on our uniform, or pinch us to get our attention. This is the calling card of a newbie traveler to get our attention. Here’s a novice concept, how about using our name? That’s what those tiny metal bars we wear are for.
  6. Comment That Your Bags Fit On The Last Plane. This is an opportune time to act puzzled when you can’t fit your items in the overhead bin. You should make comments such as, ‘well it fit on the last flight’. Here’s why it may not. Your airline may fly several types of aircraft. Therefore, your oversized roller board that fit on the 747 on your last flight won’t fit on the Dash-8 this time around. If this happens, throw a hissy fit and cause a commotion when you have to check your bag.
  7. Hang Out In The Galley. Oh, this is a favorite of Flight Attendants. If you’re bold enough to hang out in their limited work space, then go for it. Don’t be concerned that there’s barely enough room for the Flight Attendants to work in. After all, the more the merrier. And while you’re back there, why not do your stretching exercises as they’re sitting on their jumpseats? They will be your BFF as you stretch and put your body parts in their faces.
  8. Sneak Into First Class During The Boarding Process. This takes guts but I bet you can pull it off. However, don’t act surprised when you’re busted and have to walk with your tail between your legs to the economy or business class section. Flight Attendants receive a passenger manifest with a seat map at the completion of the boarding process. They know who belongs where. See if you’ve got what it takes to give yourself a free first class upgrade.
  9. Get Annoyed If Your TV Monitor Is Not Working. There are limited options Flight Attendants may perform if the majority of the TVs aren’t working while in the air. These actions are limited to resetting the system, aka, the control-alt-delete trick you use on your computer or turning it off. If that doesn’t work, become annoyed that you can’t watch TV and ask if you can get a refund on your airline ticket. It’s pretty difficult to smuggle a set of tools through the security checkpoint. But if we could, we’d love to.
  10. Continuously Ring The Call Button. Who can resist the temptation of that little button? Just think about the power lying dormant in that tiny button. If you push it, they will come. Imagine, someone will appear to fetch you whatever your heart desires. Ringing the button is acceptable when you use it for valid reasons. But those of you sitting in an aisle seat and ringing the call button when the seat belt sign is off, you get the Mile High award of the day.
  11. Take It Personally If We Skip You. Don’t use this as a reason to round up your fellow passengers and attack the Flight Attendant if he or she skips you or your row. In this occurrence, it’s OK to ring your call button. Flight Attendants are human just like everybody else and on occasion, they may miss you, so don’t take it that they’re out to get you. However, if you’ve been designated a VIP, that may simply be payback for prior actions.
  12. Refer To Flight Attendants As Stewardesses. This is a splendid way to date yourself and let everyone around you know your last flight was in 1972. This is a dated and politically incorrect phrase. The male Flight Attendants don’t like this term as it’s used to refer to a female. Employees who work on a plane are usually referred to as cabin crew, cabin staff or Flight Attendants.
  13. Remove Books, Magazines, Or Food From a Flight Attendant’s Bag. Do you have sticky fingers? Not everything on board is public property, and that includes your Flight Attendants’ personal items such as newspapers, magazines, books and food. It’s not that we don’t like to share. When we’re done reading it, we’d be more than happy to recycle and give it to you.
  14. Say ‘What?’ While Wearing Your Earphones. We know you love your TV time and enjoy using your personal electronic devices. When we ask you what you want, please refrain from saying ‘what’ or ‘huh’ while continuing to wear your earphones. It will only take 4.3 seconds to interact with us. After all, we don’t bite – hard!
  15. Not Speaking Up. When your seat mate asks for something, and you want something as well, just let us know. Don’t wait until we come back and say, “Oh I’d like some ginger ale too”. This is one of those rare occasions where you will get the perfected Flight Attendant eye roll. Feel free to remind us if it seems we forgot your request. We usually get anywhere from 5-7 requests every time we pass though the cabin and on occasion, your request may have slipped our minds.
  16. Hand Us Your Trash During Service. If we’re in the middle of serving you a beverage, a meal or a snack, now is not a good time to hand us your trash. Also, think twice about handing us your trash and say you’ve got a present for us. I’m 100% sure it’s not any present I want.
  17. Give Us Your Kid’s Diaper. Really? I’m sure your baby is the absolute cutest, but human waste isn’t. Please dispose of it either in the lavatory or take it with you to dispose of properly. And no parting gifts in the seat-back pocket either. Yuck!
  18. Try to Get a Free Ticket By Complaining. Oh yeah, the stuff of urban legends. Some complaints are valid, just like with any company. Airlines can tell the professional complainers from the valid complaints. Just because you complain doesn’t entitle you to a free airplane ticket. Constant complainers may end up on that airline’s No Fly List which may ban you from flying that airline forever.
  19. Ask Us If You’ll Make Your Connecting Flight. Let’s see. I must first summon my Magic 8 Ball to get the answer. Let’s recap your question. You didn’t tell me your name, you didn’t say your connecting flight number or your departure time and you didn’t indicate your destination. What does the Magic 8 Ball Say? “Cannot Predict Now”.
  20. Forgetting To Enjoy The Journey. Obviously, this is a lighthearted look at today’s mass airplane transportation. Taking time out to sometimes laugh at ourselves and not take things so seriously can actually diffuse less than desirable situations thus making them easier to handle. As with anything in life, it’s always your perspective that will change our view. Keep in mind that we don’t see that world as it is, we see the world as we are. Now you’re aware of the Top 20 Airplane Travel Rules, hopefully your fellow passengers and Flight Attendants will thank you for complying with this ‘Unofficial Etiquette Guide’. Fly Safe!

Reasons for Booking Your Business Class Ticket Through a Travel Concierge

If you fly regularly for business or pleasure, flying first class can take the edge off the travel time with its great amenities. But landing a cheap business class ticket can be a hard. Airlines advertise conventional fares for these tickets and most people are unaware that it is possible to pay less for the same flights. Using a travel concierge service is a wise decision to make your travel time hassle free. Travel concierges have a number of benefits for the often last minute business class flyer:

Here are the services offered by travel concierges:

• Flight notifications
• Flight booking:
• Check-in assistance
• Fast track immigrations and custom clearance
• Luggage concierge
• Airport transfers
• Hotel bookings

Advantages of using a travel concierge to get your first class flight

• Cheaper flights; travel concierges have access to a database of different airlines plying your travel route and can land you much cheaper first class tickets. They also have discounted fare rates from airlines, allowing their clients to enjoy the luxury of business class while saving you a lot of money over time.

• Save time: travel concierges provide assistance for checking in and clearing customs therefore fast tracking the entire process for you and saving you the hassle of long cheque in and clearance queues.

• Ground concierge: by assisting with your luggage on the ground and providing other services such as airport transfers, you get a truly VIP travel experience.

• Last minute first class bookings: first class bookings are rarely available last minute and the extra charges can be avoided by booking through the travel concierge.

• One way first class tickets: these are also hard to get on most airlines and more so on short notice. They can handle such bookings for you.

With this in mind, traveling business class doesn’t have to be a reserved for VIPs only. Now you too can enjoy hassle free premium travel even if only for a one way business class experience by using a travel concierge service. In some cases, they are able to get you flights discounted by as much as 70%. The facilities and services attached to first class travel including the business lounge, in-flight wifi, gourmet dining and cocktails, reclining seats and entertainment systems are designed to make your journey memorable. All this makes your travel time comfortable with plenty of rest and peak productivity for those who like to get some work done while traveling.

Be a Resourceful Budget Traveler – How to Get First Class Treatment But Still Travel Cheap!

Have you ever been passing by the VIP lounge in the airport and wondered what you would find inside? Ever wonder how to travel cheap and still get perks like first class seats? With a little ingenuity you can get VIP treatment without parting with all your cash!

So what would you find in the VIP lounge in various airports if you were allowed inside? Probably some really nice comfortable chairs, maybe an open bar, some large screen TVs, and a general feeling of peace and quiet. But how to gain access? Well, first class travelers for one thing. These guests will be allowed into the lounge to enjoy all the benefits. But of course budget travelers are not generally first class ticket holders, so is there another way?

Well, you can pay for an annual membership but that is also big bucks. So let’s scratch that idea off our list. Fortunately there are certain priority passes that can be purchased which will allow you to have access for a lower price to hundreds of lounges in hundreds of airports. So if this is a perk that you’d like to enjoy, consider one of these passes.

Another way of gaining access to VIP special treatment is to enlist the help of a real travel agent rather than making all your travel plans online. These humans can and will find you the best deals and perks possible. You will pay nothing at all for the benefit of their knowledge, and they can often steer you right toward many excellent deals and upgraded offers that you might not have been able to find otherwise.

There are also cheaper ways to be upgraded from coach to first class when traveling by air. Wouldn’t you just love to move from the back of the plane up to the front into the spacious, roomy, and very comfortable seats? But how would you do this when your ultimate goal is cheap and inexpensive travel?

Well hold onto your hat, here’s what to do. First, simply ask the clerk politely if you may be able to upgrade. This option fails more times than not, but once in a while it works. So it surely can’t hurt to try.

Another thing to try is, once you are on the plane, you can inquire of the flight attendant if you might upgrade (assuming you notice an empty and available seat). Or, you can try this sort of sneaky thing, and have a mysterious problem with your seat or a passenger next to you. If there are seats available up front you may be able to move.

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